Tim Horton - disaster in a mug

Yesterday I was plesemtly suprised to receive a packge in the mail from my two favourite Canadians. As promised the package contained a can of Canadian gold, aka. Tim Horton's finely ground coffee. I'd never tasted Tim Horton's before, but if reports were correct, I was in for quite the ride; destination - flavor country!

Problem no1 - no can opener to access Horton's grind.

Solution - an old utility knife and a mate besotted with "the old ways"

Problem no2 - I had just moved house and with boxes everywhere had no idea where the primo esspresso machine was.

Solution - an archaic electric perculator bought from a garage sale found rolling around in the back of my mate's brother's 1981 carolla.

So with two crutial hurdles cleared we continue down the path toward partaking of the fruits of Tim Horton's labor. The minutes seemed to drag as the rich aroma of the brew began to pervade the air, the churning and bubbleing was as graceful as a symphony to my cafine deprived ears. I chewed my fingernails with anticipation as the coffee blasted fourth from the $1.50 perculator. And as the steaming mug of heaven was topped with freshly steamed milk I giggled foolishly like a 4 year old on Christmas morn, then disaster....

Problem no3 - somebody thought they would sprinkle cocoa over the top of this Fuax-cuppacino.

Solution - I'm sorry son, there was nothing I could do.

The bitter taste of the cocoa made my first mouthfull a little challenging. I didn't know what to make of it. As I got closer to the bottom of the mug, I began to get a clearer sense of the true hortons flavor, but still, something wasn't quite right.... What was this flavor that I couldn't put my finger on? It wasn't the cocoa, and at first I thought the coffee may have been burnt during roasting. But now that I think about it i'm sure of it, the mystery flavor was vinegar. The machine must have been cleaned out with the stuff by it's garage selling owner. What were they thinking!

So to sum up my first experience of "The Horton" I must borrow the words of Phillip. J. Fry, "It's like a party in my mouth, and everyone's throwing up."

I look forward to the sequil; "Tim Horton - a little cup of sunshine"